Saturday, January 29, 2011
Places I Have Puked
Nausea has been my companion throughout my life. I was a car sick youngster, a pukey adult. Many things can set me off: motion, odors, dizziness, migraines, headaches, pancreatitis, gastritis, allergic reactions, medications. Today was no exception.
I took pain medication last night at about 3 AM and woke up at 9 AM and promptly tossed my cookies. Since what I tossed was undigested food (I know TMI) from what I ate at approximately 7 PM the evening before I know the pain medication was not the culprit. I had actually stopped digesting what was in my stomach approximately eight hours before taking the pain medication. This is typical for me and The Headache. I did wake up with The Headache poking needles through my brain so I am guessing the pain started getting worse the evening before and I didn't notice. Sigh.
I took 50 mg of phenergan orally, and after a brief nap I tried eating some lunch. Mission accomplished, or so I thought. I waited a little while and drove into town with my brother to pick up some meds and buy some cleaning supplies. While at the checkout line at the Dollar General store I thought - oooo not good. I had the familiar world is tipping sea sick feeling. I silently willed the super slow checkout lady to hurry up. I then took three steps from the counter and said "I don't feel too well". I hyperfocused on the bright yellow bags in the turnaround bagger device. Slow checkout lady was ignoring me, but I saw in my peripheral vision all the people in the line behind me take three steps back in horror. I grabbed a yellow sack and started ralfing in it. The checkout lady noticed and speeded up. I kept throwing up in the sack and finally quit. My brother kept saying "She's had the flu, she's had the flu" - he just did not have the fortitude I do to puke and not bother to explain. I closed the bag and mumbled something like "At least I didn't puke all over the counter". My brother grabbed my puke bag from me and started grabbing bags to take to the car.
I turned to pay and then had to grab another bag and puke again. All the counter lady could do is keep saying "are you going to pay?" I guess thinking that it was a ploy to run off with valuable Dollar General cleaning supplies. I finished with my vomiting spell and calmly turned to the debit/credit card machine and swiped my card and input my pin number. I mumbled "At least I didn't puke on your floor" as she frantically grabbed my receipt and almost threw it at me.
I stumbled out into the sunlight (it was a beautiful day in the seventies here in southern Missouri) with my bag o' puke and my receipt and my brother rushed to my rescue, grabbing my bag and disposing of it somewhere, I hope in a dumpster. I managed to drive home and have spent the entire remainder of my day sick and napping on the couch. My pancreas is hurting quite a bit so The Belly might be somewhat to blame for my malaise. That's what I get for eating some take out Chinese food the day before I guess. I may have to go visit an ER if I can't get this under control. Big Sigh.
I have no shame or embarrassment about puking in public anymore. I not only vomit, I projectile vomit!
I have puked at:
Formal Christmas Parties (pass the extra garlicky garlic mashed potatoes please - BLEH!)
Right in front of a family having a picnic in their yard
In front of a highway patrolman (I was speeding a bit trying to get to a turn off in order to puke)
On the dashboard of my car (Have done this one more than once)
At my desk at work
Running down a hallway to get to the bathroom at work
At other people's desks at work (using their trashcan)
On airplanes, both in the restroom and using the bags
in airport restrooms
At client's - thank heavens hospitals have lots of restrooms!
In hotel rooms
On the interstate
In parking lots
In hospital rooms
In emergency rooms
In every room at home
At the doctor's office - Note: Don't poke me in the stomach.
At the grocery store
Of the loading dock of a pharmacy
There are probably more, but I'm a little too nauseous to remember. After all it is a thirty year legacy of persistent puking to commemorate! I sorta feel like Stan from South Park, throwing up everytime he sees Wendy, but for me it could be anything. Hoping you all have a great non-vomiting weekend.