Sunday, February 28, 2010

Brain Fog

The Headache Doth Persist

Last weekend I woke The Headache from its slumber.  I have not been able to put it back to sleep yet.  The occipital stimulator helps, but nothing really works completely when The Headache starts to escalate.  I'm trying a little stimulator vacation this evening as my head was getting over stimulated (you feel "sore" in the stimulation area especially after hours of running it at high levels; the only way I know to make it better is to turn the stimulator down where you barely feel it running).

I hope The Headache stays at its present level while I keep the stimulator turned down.  I'm at about an eight out of ten on my pain scale; I can handle it up to a nine.  My brain is fuzzy and foggy right now, not thinking right so I hope I spell everything correctly and include all the words I intend to write!

I'm not taking any pain medication at all this evening, even though The Belly is protesting.  I have taken anti-nausea medication and antihistamines today, trying to manage the feelings of sea sickness, vertigo, and pain with non-narcotic solutions.  I don't know how people who take narcotics daily for severe headaches do it.  The headache gets really bad really quick and the narcotics don't really touch it and for me they seem to make it worse.  Maybe its just the hemicrania continua, it's a bit of a strange duck in the chronic headache world...or maybe I'm just excessively sensitive to strong pain killers...

A recent article in on hemicrania continua by Betsy Lee-Frye stated that
Hemicrania continua can be one of the most debilitating headache types experienced by migraine sufferers. The cause is unknown...
I believe the writer misspoke about it being experienced by migraine sufferers, but maybe she meant that migraine sufferers can get HC.  Hemicrania continua used to classified as a TAC (Trigimenal Autonomic Cephalgias) along with cluster headaches, not as a migraine disorder, and now is considered a primary headache disorder just like migraine and cluster headaches are.  When I am in an emergency room and I describe HC for the nurses and doctors I describe it as a cross between a migraine and a cluster headache.  The pain is more towards the cluster spectrum of pain (you can't sit still, you writhe in pain) and the swelling of the eye and runny nose are similar to cluster headaches, but the photophobia, and nausea, and unilateral presentation are more like migraines.  For me, the cyclic nature of The Headache also makes one think of cluster headaches rather than migraines.

The article also states that exercise and alcohol consumption can make hemicrania worse, which has also been my experience.  I have had one drank, a white wine spritzer, since The Headache began and I have not repeated any exposure to alcohol since.  That night was not a pleasant experience and I ended up in an ER two days later - a very expensive glass of wine.

Ms. Lee-Frye also states there has been some evidence of a link between HC and brain stem lesions from a stroke.  Nothing has shown up in any of the CT's or MRI's I have had, but I can't do the contrast so I suppose something could have been missed.  I do think I would have known if I had had a stroke when this all started, and I am not sure what difference it would make if I did find some evidence of a lesion - there would be nothing they could do for it anyway.

The old "bad pain" at 2 AM business is starting up again, making it difficult to rest.  I'm just being a whiney butt tonight.  The stimulator has gotten me used to a relatively painfree life, at least compared to the last two years.  I am just going to have to take some bad with the good, and know that life is better than it was, even if The Headache is not behaving itself.

Going to pack my head in ice, and put heating pads on my neck and shoulders and see if I can get my pain and blood pressure back under control.  I'll be so elegant, with my blue ice pack on my head and two heating pads draped on my back. 

Saturday, February 27, 2010

The Headache Persists

Pain Racked Head

Since receiving the injection of decadron last weekend The Headache had faded into the background at its normal levels of pain until today.  I only worked a few hours Wednesday and Thursday but needed to be at a meeting this AM at work, so came in early and stayed for the entire day.  This evening The Headache is trying to escape again.  I have been taking percocet for The Belly pain, and perhaps that is aggravating The Headache, hard to tell at this point, or maybe the steroid is starting to wear off.

I have at least another two weeks of travel to the client, will try and rest to see if I can get it done.  So far I have accumulated over $500 in ER co-pays just trying to be well enough to keep working in the last two months.  Doesn't seem practical or logical to keep doing this - but if I don't I can't keep working.  Big Sigh..

I have a claw of pain ripping at my head - trying hard to keep the stimulator programs varied to stop the progression.  It's helping, but it's not keeping me ahead of the pain with the increased working hours and activity.

One of the symptoms of hemicrania continua is that for a lot of us the pain gets worse with exercise.  For me that can be just simply driving my car, buying groceries, sweeping the floor, or walking up and down the hallways at a client's hospital.  The longer hours I've been working coupled with more physical activity has The Headache stirred up.  I have read with envy accounts of  people who are able to increase their natural endorphins by exercise.  I hoped that the stimulator would control the pain enough that I could get back to a more active lifestyle, but it ain't happenin'. 

Tired but not able to sleep tonight.  Ready for a lovely day tomorrow and a smooth pain free brain.  I am going to go to bed with positive thoughts to populate my dreams.  I'm breaking out with small hives all over, probably from the percocet .  I guess I will have to discontinue percocet and rechallenge to make sure that is why I am hiving.  Sigh again.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Irradiated to The Max and Beyond

Me She Hulk, Me Angry

A friend called last night to tell me to watch the local news.  Apparently the hospital I received my radiation treatment from has discovered a major miscalibration of their brain tumor treatment equipment, starting in the year I received my treatment.  The explanation I read stated that the physicist who helped setup the new equipment did not caculate the dosage correctly.  This physicist is no longer employed by the hospital group, thank goodness, but apparently the poor souls receiving radiation could have gotten significantly more radiation shot through their brains than ordered. An article about Cox Health System and the overdoses was published by the New York Times, so this is big time news around here.  See also an article and newscast from the local NBC affiliate, KY3.

I did not receive radiation treatment to my brain, but I did receive high dose rate brachytherapy which is individually calculated by a physicist - with my luck the same physicist who botched the calculation for the other machine.  The first two brachytherapy treatments I received were 15 minutes with a very heavy radiation source.  After reporting side effects after both of those treatments, I was apologized to and was told that "they" had not meant to irradiate my entire body, just a quarter inch into the skin (which is standard for brachytherapy) so they were going to change the radiation source and length of my last treatment.  It was only five minutes long with a much lighter source.  I did not have the side effect issues I had had with the prior two treatments.  I speculate that there was a gross miscalculation for the first two treatments.

I also received external beam therapy, which during my treatment was delayed several times because new software was being installed.  I don't know whether it was for machine calibration, machine control, or other purposes, but it did throw the patient flow off so it had to be related to treatment. 

I am very aggravated because I have been struggling with after effects of radiation treatment for the last five years, and have been unable to get local physicians to acknowledge the cause.  I hate to be a conspiracy theorist, but perhaps part of the problem I had getting a diagnosis was that they were already aware there was an issue with the equipment/physicist in the first place.  After all, the physician I saw in St. Louis had no problem stating my digestive, nerve and incontinence issues were due to radiation treatment, while the Dr. Dunces I saw locally had me doing the testing shuffle insisting that it must be some other organic or disease issue.  The local colorectal surgeon was the only one willing to state that the problems I had were from radiation exposure

Whether it is ever officially acknowledged or not, I am certain I received too much radiation for my body or my tissue to handle.  I have contacted the hospital and asked them to please investigate.  I hate to have to escalate my inquiries through official channels, but have no fear of doing so if needed.

I feel like the Incredible She Hulk, irradiated and glowing green ready to tear up some buildings in my rage.  I guess there isn't much to do about it now the damage is done, but gosh durn I'd like to put the smack down on some doctors! 

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Bad Headache No. 1 2010

Ambulance Ride to The ER

Haven't been blogging much the last few weeks as I have been traveling for work and have been very tired.  It's going to be a year for travel if I manage to stay employed.  After last weekend, I'm not sure what I should be doing.

I had a very tiring and stressful week - not bad stress, just stress of trying to accomplish my mission for work in an environment where the client's decisions impact my ability to succeed.  I am very goal oriented, and last week fell back to my old habit of doing "what it takes" to get the job done, regardless of the consequences to my health.  I did it again this week too, am going to have to give myself a pep talk about self care to bring myself back to practical goals that don't send me to the hospital.

Friday The Headache was trying to make a comeback.  I had worked long long days for the last 10 days before, and The Headache had had enough!  I drove the two hours home that night just hoping I could make it there without having to pull over at a nearby hospital.  I was difinitely bumming.  I got home, and Saturday cleaned house, did my grocery shopping, cooked dinner after not sleeping at all Friday night.  The Headache seemed to go back to a simmer, but Sunday it was blazing back to full blast.  Worst headache I had had in months.  I had forgotten how bad it can get.

I had been having pain like this every three to four days last year, so I guess one day so far this year is a big big improvement (thank you occipital stimulator!!).  I had not realized how bad The Headache was getting and by the time I knew I was in deep doo doo, I was in the shape where I could not drive.  I called an ambulance, and once I got to the nearest emergency room I was in so much pain from The Headache that all I could do was shake from the pain.  I was basically incoherent, so it was a good thing I had not tried to drive.

The emergency room PA (physician's assistant) was so nice, he asked what I normally took and I managed to stammer out the list of meds - fentanyl or dilaudid (my preference fentanyl because I'm not knocked out for hours) benedryl, solumedrol, and phenergan.  Apparently phenergan is not supposed to be administered IV anymore (I never had an issue with it but I guess it's not to be given that way just IM injections) so I got compazine instead, which makes me twitchy but does stop the nausea.  Instead of solumedrol, I got decadron (dexamethasone) which is a much harsher steroid but lasts much longer, and I got benedryl and fentanyl.  It took a couple of hours but I got better, with The Headache going from a 9.9 to a 7 on my pain scale.   My sister was able to come and pick me up so I was able to get back home.

I was still working at the client's site so the next morning I struggled to get ready and pack and head out.  The decadron took my voice away - steroids do that to me.  I go from a tinny Minnie Mouse voice to a baritone Miley Cyrus voice.  Not sure why, just another example of why steroids are not a very good thing to have to take!!  I stayed at the clients until yesterady evening, and have worked a little from home today and will go back to work tomorrow.

It may be the steroids, or maybe just the shock of the intense pain, but I am very shakey today.  My legs are wobbly, and I am having a lot of trouble concentrating.  The Belly is acting up, but I know from past experience steroids mess with my pancreas so I'm guessing that is why.

I am supposed to go to the client's again next week.  Sigh.  Not sure if I am physically up to it.  You know, I found this job seven years ago and it has been a dream job for me.  Love the work, love the people, love the clients.  I'm not ready to let it go, but I'm not sure if I can figure out a way to accomplish what I need to do.   The new trainer that was hired has already left the company.  I can honestly say I didn't scare her off, as I have been at the client's all this week, but I am very discouraged because I wanted to have someone I could hand responsibilities off to so if I needed to fade off the job I wouldn't feel I left my bosses in the lurch. (Wow, was that a run on sentence or what??  I'm blaming the steroids!)

The Headache is being contrary this evening probably because I have not rested it this week either.  I am going to take a pain pill for The Belly (I haven't been taking any because they seem to aggravate The Headache) and go to sleep.  Hoping you, my friends, have a pain free night!

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Haunted Head

The Headache Remains
Paid very close attention this last week at the client's to see what was making the nausea so overwhelming.  Was it medication?  Was it my pancreas? Was it The Belly?  Was it The Headache?  Was it simply traveling?

I've come to the conclusion that the culprit is mainly The Headache, with a sprinkling of The Belly thrown in.  I found if I didn't walk much, and I sat very very still, I was able to manage the nausea although with some difficulty.  If I moved around, walking down corridors, standing and assisting others, then the nausea quickly (within five minutes of the activity) got much much worse. 

The pancreas when inflamed can be irritated by body movement, but this time I'm pretty sure it is The Headache.  I have had trouble with my left eye swelling and being light sensitive, pain in the left side of my face, terrible physical coldness, and congestion in the left side of my nose.  The Headache even became painful despite the occipital stimulator.  My hopes of regaining some physical activity in my life are sorta fading, as the level of activity was similar to what would send The Headache through the stratosphere of pain last year.  I am glad the pain is not nearly so bad but the other symptoms seem to not be changed at all by the stimulator.  Bummer.

I have started taking a anticholinergic medication again called methscopolamine bromide or Pamine.  It is supposed to help with stomach spasms in addition to helping with nausea and stomach acid production.  It is an older drug that my pharmacy has to special order for me, as apparently no one else in the area takes it.  It seems to be somewhat more effective for The Belly pain than any non-narcotic I have taken.  I had quit taking it last fall due to side effects, so will wait and see what the next few days bring.

I have started a new blog called Illustrating Illness.  There will be no narrative, just personal artwork/ illustrations about illness.  All pictures that are on there now are mine, but I hope that others will submit theirs for posting also.  I find that finding a way to visually express how I feel is therapeutic for me and I would love to experience how others voice their illness through art.  I have a niece that is majoring in art therapy and I am sure somewhere in her curriculae there is an explanation as to why this works for me, but I am not going to analyze the how it works, I am just happy it does work!

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Traveling Prepared

They Have Fair Warning

Getting ready to travel to a client's again. Will be gone until the end of the week if all goes well. Thinking of taking my own Do Not Disturb sign after my last experience at this hotel. NO TOWELS...Read the fine print....NO TOWELS!

Feeling a little better today, but still not sleeping right, or eating right. The pain on eating is getting more severe, although the nausea is cutting back a bit. The Belly may behave during the next few days, but I have no confidence that it will.

The Headache has been trying to escape again from its electronic bonds. My head got "overstimulated" and I had to turn my magic box of zappiness down and then The Headache decided to try again. Tired of this mess, but I guess this is my lot in life. I am grateful I have this much control over it - last year at this time I had none.

After having the hives with the percocet I have determined that perhaps pain killers are just not for me. I will give it a go again when I feel I absolutely have to take something or end up in the ER.

Monday, February 8, 2010

Kryptonite Belly

Wish I was Invulnerable

My sister invited my brother and I over to watch the Super Bowl on their very nice, very large flat screen TV. I brought chips and dip and a fruit platter, and she made low fat hot deli sandwiches and we had a nice light supper also.

I ate about three inches of my sandwich, and some of the fruit, and a tablespoon of the layered dip that used no-fat sour cream. I enjoyed watching the Super Bowl, but my nausea and pain just kept increasing.

We left after the Super Bowl was finished, and I came home, where the pain and nausea increased. I took phenergan trying to stop nausea, and after about another half hour I took a percocet for pain.

Unfortunately, I started breaking out in small hives after taking the percocet. I can't tell if I'm allergic to pain medication, or just determined to have hives regardless. Then the nausea started ramping up, and I threw up everything I had eaten this evening (which wasn't much). Probably also threw up the pain medication. Three AM and still vomiting. Not sure what tomorrow will bring.

Going to try to go to sleep, praying that I can quit throwing up. Not sure what to do about it. Getting really shaky and cold feeling today, would like to have some real energy. The pain is increasing, but won't take more medication since I'm not sure how much stayed with me.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Does Anyone Really Know What Causes Migraines?

Your Guess is as Good as Mine

Heather at War On Headaches stated in a comment to a recent post (MRI Results)

I'm beginning to think that headache pain is simply headache pain, and there may not be an explanation. Don't get me wrong - I'm not giving up on trying to get better; I'm just thinking that trying to find the source may be a wild goose chase!

This got me to thinking, and since my brain is on permanent circuit overload status that can be a dangerous thing. What would I find in PubMed if I did a simple search on 'causes of migraine headache'? Surely I would find some consensus, especially with the plethora of imaging techniques and genetic tests and new drug studies. Instead of consensus, I found no unified field theory of causation, and much disagreement on disease mechanism.

I only went through a few pages (sorted by most recent relevant contributions to journals) and came up with a short list. After review I wonder if what we call "migraine" is actually a catch all for several disparate diseases which all cause similar symptoms by different mechanisms. Perhaps that is why it is so difficult to manage, because there is no real "it"...rather migraine is a loose definition of a entire spectrum of disorders

A couple of surprises were a link to a specific pesticide, association with high levels of air pollution, and mitochondrial damage associated with medication, including acetaminophen. I had migraines BEFORE acetaminophen was ever marketed, so I definitely know in my case there is no correlation to that one. Here's the list I compiled:

1. Patent foramen ovale
2. Metabolic Syndrome
3. Obesity & dysfunction in the orexins pathways
4. Changes in extracellular sodium and potassium levels in spinal fluid and the brain
5. Air pollution
6. Dilation of dural vessels
7. Exaggerated or abnormal neurotransmitter responses to normal cyclic changes in the ovarian hormones
8. vasodilatation provoked by calcitonin gene-related peptide
9. Neurogenic inflammation of meningeal vessels provoked by peptides released from trigeminal sensory neurons
10. Pituitary adenylate cyclase activating peptide-38 (PACAP38)
11. Mutations in ion channels causing imbalance in the activity of excitatory and inhibitory neurons
12. Dysfunctions in the neuronal networks in the brain stem (especially in the serotoninergic nuclei) or the hypothalamus (SCN)
13. Medication induced mitochondrial damage; offending medications include acetaminophen and psychotropic drugs
14. Cortical activation, which disinhibits craniovascular sensation through the nucleus raphe magnus (NRM)
15. Inflammation of the meninges, particularly the dural membranes that surround the brain
16. Mutations of the voltage-gated K+channels of the K(V)7 (KCNQ) family
17. Pesticide Antracol Combi WP 76
18. Cytokine and immune system modifications
19. Nitric oxide and the transcription factor nuclear factor-kappaB (NF-kappaB)
20. 5-HT(1F) receptors and/or 5-HT(7) receptors

See what happens when I take pain medication and I can't sleep? I come up with simplistic suppositions of semi-scientific speculation and can't stop the alliteration bandwagon for the life of me!!!

On a personal note, no nausea today so far, so ate a small but real supper (dinner for you city folk). The Belly protested with pain, so I took a Percocet. The pain decreased slightly and I don't feel drugged at all AND so far no hives!! Woohoo! My PCP said this is a low dose, so maybe this is something I will be able to take and still be able to work.

I worked today for about six hours helping look at conversion data for a client, and working on testing some programs. It was very difficult for me as I have no energy and am very very shaky feeling (this was way before I took the Percocet). My boss announced yesterday they have hired someone as a trainer, bless his sweet heart!! I am so relieved; although I have communicated with my bosses about my illness, I have not been honest with them or myself about how difficult it is for me to work. After the last couple of weeks have been afraid that I may not be able to continue and they would not have anyone to do what I have been doing, so I am relieved they have found someone!

Working is almost more than I can do, and the last two weeks have made this even more clear. I love the work I do and the people I work with and the company I work for. I am more fulfilled at this job than any I have had in years. No matter how difficult it is to go to work, I just can't envision my life with out this, but I want to be fair to my bosses too. They have a right to a worker who can actually get through a day without getting so ill she can't continue. I am trying my best to get better, but its not happening fast enough for me.

My mother and family are wanting me to quit and apply for disability. In all practicality, even if I wanted to apply for disability, there is no way for me to survive financially while I wait 18 months to two years for a disability determination hearing. In the U.S.A. [note: opinion not fact] you have a 99.9% chance you will be denied disability on initial application. I wonder what this administrative intensive process costs us as taxpayers compared to the miniscule savings it initiates by discouraging fraudulent claims? A false economy that was implemented by Ronald Reagan for political mileage in the 1980's. Time for this regulating rule to be revisited! And at the same time, make disabled citizens immediately available for Medicare, no 18 month waiting period.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Been Whupped by a Wupenstick

Sick in Hotel Hell

Found a great site,, that sells walking sticks and "bonkers". No offense to their products (I really want one of those walking sticks) but I think I was beat up with a big bonker wupenstick this week, and I've not recovered yet.

At about 3 a.m. Monday I gave up trying to not throw up and headed to the ER, hoping I had a bug or something they could medicate with antibiotics. I was told that nope, it was just the chronic pancreatitis, nothing they could do, but they gave me a bit shot of zofran and some torradol for the pain. Unfortunately I forgot that torradol was on my bad pancreas list. I go from the ER to work, with no sleep at all, because I know what was coming this week. I have been with this company for seven years and know the drill for new client training by now.

I print out everything I need for this week, prep some files in case I need more, go home sleep 30 minutes, go see my PCP at about three in the afternoon, and get a script for zofran and more prilosec (I was thinking maybe I was having stomach irritation) and percocet, which I guess is OXYcodone as opposed to HYDROcodone, and less likely to give an allergic reaction to opiate sensitive individuals. I don't know, as I haven't taken any yet (this is Thursday) because I am afraid to. I think the suffering will have to get much greater before I try to take this.

I drive to the client's Monday night. It now has been a couple of days without any real rest, so I have trouble staying awake to drive. I drive 15 minutes, pull off the side of the road, sleep fifteen minutes, drive another 15 minutes....well, you get the idea. It takes over three hours to drive a normal 90 minute distance. I get to the hotel, but of course I am now wide awake. Sigh...

I get to the client's early on Tuesday because of a special request I am squeezing in with my regular training classes. I feel nauseous even tho I took the zofran that morning. I get more nauseous towards noon. I eat a canned peach and applesauce for lunch, probably more than I should have eaten. I get sicker all afternoon. The clients had me double booked for training, and I am so grateful my bosses sent backup for me!

I get to the hotel on Tuesday at about 5:30 pm, and start vomiting by 6 pm. I continue throwing up every five to fifteen minutes until about 11 PM, and then about every half hour until morning. I drag myself around, making myself presentable, and head out early to the client again.

The Headache manifests itself as soon as I get to the clients. I start thinking about the prior evening and day, and realize that perhaps what I had been thinking was The Belly was really The Headache. Because the head pain did not become intense until Wednesday I had not recognized that the autonomic and other symptoms had become pretty bad. My left eye was swollen, my left eye was teary, and I think the pupil was not the same size as my right eye, I was extremely light sensitive, and odors were making the nausea much much worse. I crank up the volts in the stimulator but it was too late, The Headache had escaped its bounds and was hellbent on revenge.

I threw up every fifteen minutes for a couple of hours, then I threw up every five minutes for another couple of hours, and finally before noon I threw in the towel and went back to the hotel. Everytime I threw up The Headache got worse. I couldn't stop vomiting so called my PCP and started on his recommended regimen of alternating phenergan and benedryl every three hours. It took until around 10 pm but I finally put The Headache and The Belly to sleep.

I had to ward off the hotel staff because despite the "Do Not Disturb" sign on my door they desperately wanted to give me clean towels. I finally had to bluntly say, "I am sick, do not bother me. I do not need more towels." I tip housekeeping when I travel, and I think because they had already gathered the tip they were afraid I would be grumpy if they hadn't finished the room. I was just grumpy because they wouldn't leave me alone about the towels inbetween my vomiting bouts.

Today I gathered myself up and went back to the clients ready for round three. Ping! I was off and running, double booked yet again! Thank goodness again my backup was there. I just moved between training rooms, checking back and forth. I made it through the day without vomiting, but am not so sure what tonight will bring.

A long grumpy post, but really what I have accomplished is that I have worked more hours in the last two weeks straight than I have in a long long time, even with the time out for throwing up. I go to work tomorrow, hopefully, and again on Sunday to help look over converted data. The clients were so kind about my puking - thank heavens they have tons of bathrooms (however all were using this heavy vanilla musk scented room deodorant that made my nausea worse).

Hoping to get through next week, not looking forward to the puking marathon that will probably ensue. Sigh again....

Monday, February 1, 2010

Dreaming of Running

Wild Horses

Dream time again - this time no drugs, no pain killers, more's the pity. Maybe its exhaustion making my imagination run wild?

Horses running through the air, thundering by, leaving trails of fractured light glinting from their heavy hooves. I try to watch them, but they are too fast. I try to follow, but they go where I can't. Wishing I could run with them to parts unknown, but I won't.

I'm not a horse person. I'm too short and trusting, they're too large and crafty. Not sure why the horses during a nap earlier this evening. A metaphore for how I feel about next week I am afraid - wild horses will have to drag me there???

My pain is better this evening, but I am sicker feeling. High lipase levels make me feel this way, but it could just be as simple as another infection. Not sure what to do.

I should go to the doctor tomorrow, but if I do that something else work related will have to slide, and I don't have the time for that. I was hoping to catch a ride to the client's with someone else from work tomorow evening because I don't want to drive the two hours feeling like I do, but if I do anything other than go to work it won't be possible. If I wait too long to see the doctor, I could end up back in the hospital. Maybe the horses in my dream were ready to draw and quarter me ala Genghis Khan style.....story of my life: darned if I do, and darned if I don't. Nothing is simple.

I was so happy I had some vestige of control over the pain, and now that is gone. Maybe my hope was what was running by in the dream, not horses. I guess it was for the best, I think the hydrocodone was making The Headache a little worse besides giving me hives. Maybe the doctor will have some magic pill up his sleeve that will save the day, but my brain is telling me probably not so.

I've been trying to eat beets because I read on an online support group for persons with Sphincter of Oddi and pancreas problems that beets could be beneficial. However, they seem to be going through me without digesting, just like the rest of my food, so not sure if I am gaining any benefit from eating these. Guess I should be glad I don't mind eating cooked beets or pickled beets.

I wanted to work on a project this weekend, and I have done nothing but sit around in pain and feeling sorry for myself. Suck it up Emily - time to get moving! Maybe that was the meaning of my dream?