When I hit the big four oh, I found that my body started to fall apart one piece at a time. My warranty had expired and there was No Extended Warranty available! This is the story of my struggle to keep it all together using spare parts and baling twine.
Saturday, August 7, 2010
I was going to write an entry for Diana Lee's headache blog on Coping with Headache Disorders. This is how dysfunctional my last month has made me - I can't Cope with writing a post on Coping.
I am underwater and running out of air. The surface of the water seems far away and it's light is fading and I don't have the strength to swim for it. I dream of quiet streams, floating in the current, allowing it to carry me to lands unknown.
I don't think I am Coping with anything right now. I am ReActing. Reaction is a response to immediate circumstances without any regard to success. Coping is a planned effort to better a situation and plan to avoid future bad Reactions.
I am planning to travel this next week. I am hoping just to survive without having to hit the emergency room. There will be several of us traveling together, and I won't have to drive. I am past being able to drive which is also something I am not Coping with very well.
I think I am just going to run away and join the Circus. Everything will be fine if I was with the Circus! Send in the Clowns - well maybe next year...