Saturday, November 20, 2010
Want to Run Away
Ready to run away. If I could get away from The Headache, The Belly, and The Legs I would. I guess all that would be left would The Arms and The Back....hmmmm guess that's not practical. Sigh. My problems are inescapable but wishing they weren't.
New diabetic medicine, more thyroid medication from a new specialist, an endocrinologist, Dr. Kid (he seems very very young!). The cankles are disappearing so maybe the low thyroid was to blame for cankle hell. Will be glad to wear regular shoes again instead of the cankle friendly models I have been sporting lately. Not excited about changing diabetic meds since my diabetes is the one thing in good control...but he had a point that Avandia has had some pretty bad press lately, so instead of Avandia and metformin I am taking Actos and time released metformin. Can't tell any difference so maybe that's a good thing!
Bad headache day Friday. Not to the emergency room point, but bad enough I had to take major meds in order to NOT go to the emergency room. Payback for the week and the traveling. My head is still not working today, but I am trying to go medication free since I had things to do. Actually napped for a while today which is really rare for me.
I feel ready to throw in the towel this weekend. No energy, no mind power left. I'm tired of dragging my legs around trying to make them work, tired of the pain, tired of being tired, tired of coping, tired of traveling, tired of work, tired of things NOT working, tired of medication, tired of being sick, tired of doctors. I want to jump up and down and throw a screaming fit about it all! But I'm too pooped to do it. Being old and tired and sick sucks, can't even throw a decent tantrum any more.
I knew I would pay a price for traveling to Michigan. I went anyway. This is my own fault. I could have said no. Too late now. I need to quit griping and just live with the consequences. I'm just not as tough as I used to be, not as tough as I want to be, not as tough as I thought I was. Arrrrrrgh. I'm just going to have to suck it up and get on with business.....if I can.