Saturday, November 20, 2010

Want to Run Away

Bad Day, Bad Week

Ready to run away.  If I could get away from The Headache, The Belly, and The Legs I would.  I guess all that would be left would The Arms and The Back....hmmmm guess that's not practical.  Sigh.  My problems are inescapable but wishing they weren't.

New diabetic medicine, more thyroid medication from a new specialist, an endocrinologist, Dr. Kid (he seems very very young!).  The cankles are disappearing so maybe the low thyroid was to blame for cankle hell.  Will be glad to wear regular shoes again instead of the cankle friendly models I have been sporting lately. Not excited about changing diabetic meds since my diabetes is the one thing in good control...but he had a point that Avandia has had some pretty bad press lately, so instead of Avandia and metformin I am taking Actos and time released metformin.  Can't tell any difference so maybe that's a good thing!

Bad headache day Friday.  Not to the emergency room point, but bad enough I had to take major meds in order to NOT go to the emergency room.  Payback for the week and the traveling.  My head is still not working today, but I am trying to go medication free since I had things to do.  Actually napped for a while today which is really rare for me.

I feel ready to throw in the towel this weekend.  No energy, no mind power left. I'm tired of dragging my legs around trying to make them work, tired of the pain, tired of being tired, tired of coping, tired of traveling, tired of work, tired of things NOT working, tired of medication, tired of being sick, tired of doctors.  I want to jump up and down and throw a screaming fit about it all!  But I'm too pooped to do it.  Being old and tired and sick sucks, can't even throw a decent tantrum any more.

I knew I would pay a price for traveling to Michigan.  I went anyway.  This is my own fault.  I could have said no.  Too late now.  I need to quit griping and just live with the consequences.  I'm just not as tough as I used to be, not as tough as I want to be, not as tough as I thought I was.   Arrrrrrgh.  I'm just going to have to suck it up and get on with business.....if I can.


  1. Sorry you feel so cruddy. Don't you love when doctor visits mean more pills. I did Actos and Metformen ER for a while.
    I know a place we could run away to :) It has always reduced my pain in the past. If we're still crabby we'd blend in with Grumpy!

  2. I'm about the right height for one of the seven dwarves! And I'm sorta Goofy! However, I'm a true Pluto fan myself.

    I think sometimes the new doc just wants to change something for the sake of change, not for any other reason. If I could have come up with a good excuse not to change I would have used it, but the mind is not working too quick this week!!!

  3. Ohhhhh -- I know what you're feeling. (Or at least my version of being totally drained to the point of no brain power.) I hope you're having a restful weekend and that it helps you recuperate before the holiday week starts!!

    I just totally identify with what you've written in this post. I do the same thing -- push myself to do something I know I will pay a price for, and then feel resentful about the consequences. (Er, I'm labeling my feelings, not yours. I don't mean to presume.)

    Anyway, I hope next week is a MUCH better week, and that the holiday isn't too stressful for you.

  4. Winny, I wish you could get away from the headache and all of your pain as well. As well as all the meds, the doctors the side affects!

  5. Aviva: You hit it on the head - spot on as the British would say. Ah well, as I say tomorrow will be a better day!!!

    I'm lucky - not a great cook - so my brother is cooking Thanksgiving at my house this year! WooHoo!!! All I had to do was buy the ingredients (what I had to do yesterday)...Today is my restup and get better today!.

    JBR: Thanks for the wishes! Especially the one about doctors. I wonder if they get as sick of messing with patients as we get of messing with THEM??? Hoping you have a good week, and a pleasant holiday even if it means staying at home!

  6. I'm glad you got back from Michigan safely, albeit in pain :(

    But yay for disappearing cankles!

  7. Heather: You have found the silver lining in my cloud. YES - cankles begone!!!! WooHoo!!!

  8. Thanks Migrainista - needing the hugs especially today....