Thursday, March 25, 2010
The Color of Pain
Pain has become a too familiar part of my life the last few years. For me pain has aspects that hard hard to define, but distinct. I feel almost like an officiando of pain, just like some people know all about wine and all the subtle nuances and sub-notes of the taste and appearance.
Sometimes pain is warm fuzzy and familiar with a hint of vanilla. Sometimes it is jagged sharp bitter as alum and just plain scary. It's like a stinky old stiff sock that needs to be washed, or the all encompasing embrass of an itchy robe. The red wash of pain turns white hot when it goes into the stratosphere of pain, and the cold blue that my fingers get as the pain heads to the worst.
Today has been an red rimmed orange day, merging into pink, with purple overtones. It's sandpaper on toothpicks with a soldering iron searing into my legs. Hot cinnamon vinagrette flavors it all, making my skin hurt. Ready to rest and get to tomorrow already.
Have a bone density scan tomorrow, first since radiation therapy six years ago. Not sure what will show up, I'm guessing its a DEXA scan - its supposed to be of the spine and hips. I've shrunk in the last few years at least an inch; I'm afraid if I shrink too much I won't be able to sit in the big person chairs at work!!