Got My Tiara Serviced

Now Where's My Invite??

No invitation to the royal wedding even though I am absolutely positively certain (as far as I could possibly be from cadging other people's research on Ancestry.com) I have royal blood, even if it is diluted by about four or five hundred years of peasant DNA.  I've got my imaginary tiara all polished up and shiny just for the occasion,  I am very sad I was not invited but I would have had to decline anyway because I have yet another doctor appointment tomorrow.

I saw Dr. Pepper today, and good news - no UTI on the urinalysis dip stick test.  Bad news - he can't tell if I have a kidney infection even tho I am running a fever.  He decided to poke me in The Belly.  Not such a good thing for me.  Now I am having periods of great pain, spasms from my picky pancreas, and spasms from my right kidney and ureter.  I asked him not to poke but he wasn't listening or was just going to do it anyway.  I would like him to sit for hours in this kind of hurt (even with a pain patch on) just because some decided to feel his liver.  The Xray of my kidneys didn't show any stones still there, so it will take awhile for me to build some up again.  WooHoo!!!  Not so good news, he wants to an IVP next Tuesday to check the plumbing to make sure there are no obstructions and maybe see a reason for the fever.  Sometimes soft tissue problems are hard to see on CT's and Xrays (and I can't do MRI's because of my occipital stimulator implant).

I had hives when I had an IVP in the 1990's because of kidney issues (which were really because the growing cancer in my uterus was pulling down on my right kidney).  Contrast is injected in order to visualize the flow of urine.  It was the first time I had a reaction to contrast media.  Now I have anaphylactic reactions even to minute amounts of contrast media.  Dr. Pepper ordered a pre-treatment medication protocol for me (generally prednisone and benedryl) but I am not sure if I should move forward with the scheduled test.

I am about ready to chicken out of the test. The pain and swelling and breathing problems that come from having an anaphylactic reaction are very scary. The last one I had during a MRI no one was there to treat the reaction and I had to drive myself to the urgent care a couple of blocks away, while my blood pressure was dropping and my breathing got very raspy. I managed to get myself into urgent care, and walked up to the desk and whispered (because my vocal cords were swelling) that this was an emergency reaction. I am sure the beautiful outcrop of large red hives all over my face made me quite the sight. They had me back in seconds giving me epinephrine. I now carry my epipens with me even to healthcare appointments because I could have died in the time it took me to get to my car, start it, drive 2 blocks, park it and walk into the urgent care. Just reinforced my lack of faith in the competency of local medical facilities.

I see Dr. Calm my immunologist tomorrow.  I hope he can give me some guidance on the wisdom of avoiding the IVP or the efficacy of the pre-medication pack.  I am hiving a great deal still, and definitely don't want to make it worse.

My sister and I were commiserating about how hard it is to arrange appointments, work with co-pays and deductibles, and just get responsible followup care.  I feel that my health management is pretty much up to me to keep track of all of this, and I just get tired of trying. I'm thinking give me a $10.00  prescription of antibiotics and I wouldn't need a test at all.

Adding a nice pipe organ rendering of Felix Mendelssohn's Wedding March to fend off my royal wedding blues.  However, the way I am feeling I may be up in the wee hours of this morning so maybe I will watch. Hoping you all have a Royally good time tomorrow and don't get too bored with all the coverage.

I Hates Kidney Stones

Rock-a-Bye Bladder

Last week, thought I was done with kidney stone #2 for 2011.  Ha!  Of course, life could not be so easy.  I was able to get to work Monday - yeah!!!  Tuesday, I had to go to my PCP's office because I was in serious trouble from KS#2.  I felt dehydrated even though I was drinking lots of liquids, and very little of the liquids was leaving my body.  Signs of a very bad UTI and probably kidney infection, most probably from KS#2 cutting its way out.  That explained that!!!  I was nauseated, dizzy, and in pain.  Stinking kidney stone!

I got my antibiotics, and got to work Wednesday. WooHoo!!! Twice in one week!!!  Oh, nooooo - KS#2 pain again in the night - no sleep so I just went back into work earlier on Thursday.  Got sicker and sicker and couldn't go to the bathroom at all.  Around 12:30 I called it quits and went to the emergency room.  I got fluids to help push whatever I needed to push out of my body.  The antibiotic seemed to be killing the bacteria they found on Tuesday, so no change needed there.  After three hours on an IV I was able to FINALLY go potty.  I wanted to dance and clap my hands and sing the big girl goes to potty song, but I held back my glee.  I did pass "debris" that was a result of KS#2's descent out of my kidney so hopefully this will be the end of that boulder.

Pain and discomfort tonight but nothing like last night.  I'm going to try to sleep despite the thunderstorm overhead.  Lightening hit my neighbor's transformer and he has no electricity, but luckily for me ours came right back on after flashing off after the lightening strike.  Hoping to make it to work tomorrow again.  

Going to a client's next week, taking a back seat while the new guy does the talking.  This is difficult for me - I'm quite the talker, but I am so glad to be training someone to do this I will gladly zip it!!!  I like traveling with the boss who will be going with us.  This is someone I admire greatly.  I worry that she is getting as burned out with all the travel and installation work as I am. It is just very hard to maintain a balance between home life and work life when you go from one intense implementation to the next. 

Thinking of bosses, the Big Guy made me cry this week because he just said he was worried about my health and had I thought about just going on disability.  He said he would be willing to work with me with whatever I decided.  I had such a bad few weeks, with The Problem at home, my Mom, and myself and KS#2 and poopy pants and stress stress stress that the kindness just overwhelmed me.  I can handle tough times much better than I can handle kindness and thoughtful consideration. 

Have I ever said I love the company I work for and my job??  That even makes me sadder to think I really can't hardly keep going onward.  I am going to get them through this next installation and reassess.  I talked it over with my PCP this week and he said it should be a no-brainer for social security disability determination but having been a federal employee years ago I understand "No-brainer" might be more description of the process than I wish.  I definitely would have bad enough luck to anger someone and make them use their "clerkly powers" against me.  Sigh.  I guess I shouldn't go buying trouble eh??

Health care is the conundrum I cannot figure out if I do decide to try for disability.  I will make enough that the Medicaid spend down (if I qualify for Medicaid) would be so high as to be useless.  I will just have to think on this.  It is one of the main reasons I have not retired yet.  Big sigh....

Finally - Dr. House

Crisis Management vs. Healthcare Appointment

Life here at my house has been not only hectic but in a tizzy.  I have not been blogging, and I have been staying close to home mostly because I had to help manage someone else's serious health issues and my Mom needed me close by.   She does not have the coping skills to keep up when events turn sideways quickly. Tonight I have some time to blog because while the crisis is not totally past I know everyone involved is safe and well cared for at this time.

The crisis was an hangover from the prior week, so my week got even better when kidney stone #2 of 2011 decided to pass Tuesday night. I debated about calling an ambulance. The pain (even with the fentanyl patch) was so severe I could not drive, stand or doing anything but squeak icky noises. My Mom was having enough problem coping with the other issues, I just couldn't leave her at home while I went to the ER to get help with KS#2. I rationalized that the ambulance would take 20 minutes to get to my house, the ride would take another 45 minutes, and I wouldn't get any pain relief at the hospital for at least another hour - and by then the stone might have passed. I toughed it out and finally got some liquids down my gullet to help push KS#2 down the path after about five hours of extreme spasms. Not something I would recommend if you didn't have to. Big sigh.

Wednesday I wasn't eating much of anything because of KS#2, but I had a tiny piece of some cashew brittle.  I don't eat cashews very often and never cashew brittle but thought maybe the sugar would pick me up and the protein in the cashew would actually digest.  I started having an anaphylactic reaction - joints swelling, stomach hurting awfully, hives popping out, itching itching ITCHING.  I thought - if I use the Epipen I will have to go to the emergency room, so I took two benedryls and a phenergan instead.  This did drop the swelling and some of the itching and stomach pain but I had forgotten I am wearing a fentanyl patch for pain.  I got a little scared because it did become difficult to breathe.  With anaphylaxis it is hard to tell if the problem with breathing is asthma, anaphylactic reaction, or medication problem.  I used my rescue inhaler but it didn't help much.  I think this was a drug-drug interaction between the benedryl, phenergan and fentanyl.  Too much too quickly.  I guess next time I will use an epipen.  Bigger sigh.


I had my appointment Thursday with Dr. House in St. Louis concerning The Legs and the neuropathic pain and weakness.  I had planned on taking Wednesday to drive up to St. Louis (because I fall asleep so badly when I drive it takes me at least a couple more hours to drive this than normal) spend the night, go to my doctor appointment, toodle around St. Louis some, maybe eat some really good Italian food on The Hill, go to Union Station, shop at the Dillard's outlet store - my usual St. Louis jaunt - spend the night again and drive back home Friday.  With The Problems at home taking precedence I decided to drive up and back on Thursday.  Very Big sigh.

I left at one in the morning.  The normal four and a half hour drive took me almost seven hours.  I had to keep pulling over to take a nap.  Nothing kept me awake.  Lately driving at night has gotten me very disoriented.  I seem to lose directional sense and depth perception.  Just what all the other drivers really needed to have on the road with them.  If I had only had the money I would have gotten airplane tickets to St. Louis, and then taxi'd it to Barnes Jewish for the appointment.  Ah well, I was very cautious driving and as dawn approached my vision difficulties got better.  Sigh yet again.

Fecal incontinence makes traveling a difficult problem.  Normally I won't drink very many fluids for two or three days before traveling, and don't drink very much during travel.  However passing KS#2 became a priority so I was primed full of fluids.  I took extra clothing with me, and was very glad because mid way I had an accident.  Since my external sphincter is not as functional as it should be, I just don't have pucker power.  As I explained to my colorectal specialist once the poop chute is loaded the payload delivers regardless.  I changed clothes twice before my appointment.  I was so glad I had brought the extras!!!

My appointment with Dr. House was at 9:30 am, but I got there early and was seen much earlier.  I had been to the Center for Advanced Medicine for Washington University Medical School, and Barnes Jewish Hospital before.  I saw Dr. Bellyfixer about the digestive issues I had from the radiation therapy overexposure in 2004.  He was quite helpful, and I found Dr. House and his team just as thorough and helpful.  Wash U definitely Rocks!!!

A young neurologist took my history and did a physical exam.  He did notice my permanent hive on my nose - I told him it was my Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer spot.  I guess it helps that I had gotten some sun, because that makes it shine more perfectly beautiful.  I warned him I already had several rare diseases, and if I got one more rare disease I might not believe it. Ha!!  I was so tired I am not sure if I made very good sense.  Good lord I had to remember who was president and do math and spell things backwards!  This is a woman who just pooped her pants twice in the last 7 hours.  I don't know if I was competent to do anything that required brain power...  When he got out the large safety pin to poke me with, I almost pooped my pants again.  Ouch! 

I had brought copies of xrays/mri's/ct scans that Young Dr. Kildare had said Dr. House would need.  Nope - didn't need any of them because I don't have a physical issue with my spine or hips.  I brought copies of Dr. Kildare's notes, nope they didn't need any of them.  They were glad that I had brought the immunology labs and some DNA testing I had done (I thought of that on my very own - take THAT Dr. Kildare!!!).  Dr. House and the young neurologist consulted with each other out in the hallway, then Dr. House came in and introduced himself.  Very nice, not like the TV Dr. House at all.  No arrogance, no immediate attempt to blame me for my problems.

Dr. House repeated part of the physical neurological exam.  Thank heavens - no current event quiz, spelling bee or math problems.  I was halfway expecting him to make them more difficult - there is a train traveling east at 40 mph etc. etc. etc.  Whew!!!  We discussed why Dr. Kildare had sent me there, and his conclusion that I had small fiber neuropathy.  We also discussed my problems with my bowels, bladder, pelvic pain, and nerve pain and that I associate the onset with my vaginal brachytherapy treatments in 2004.  Dr. House said he was going to repeat the EMG and nerve conduction tests using their techniques before he decided I had small fiber neuropathy.  If the tests were negative, then I might need to have a nerve biopsy.  He said their techniques were generally more sensitive than the ones I had in Springfield by Dr. Welby.

I got my blood test orders and the nerve test orders and was sent directly to the EMG lab.  The lady doing most of the test took her time and did much more extensive testing and also warmed up my foot saying if it was cold it could distort the test.  A doctor came in after she was done and read the results of her tests.  It showed a very subtle difference between the speed of the nerves in my arms verses the speed of the nerves in my legs. He said that he would probably say I had large fiber neuropathy, but did the needle part of the test which was normal first.  He went to discuss his findings with Dr. House.

The lab got me admitted to their services and I gave about a gallon of blood for some tests for other causes of neuropathy.  Not sure what they were but Dr. House said it would take a couple of weeks to get the results back so they may have to ship some of it off.

I went back to Dr. House's office to see if I needed a nerve biopsy.  He said that they had all concluded that I had large fiber neuropathy (which Dr. Welby had not detected).  I asked the cause and he did not say that it was diabetes, but he did say he just couldn't prove it was the radiation.  I asked him about the weakness and the pain increasing with activity and he said that was normal with this type of neuropathy.  I asked about physical therapy, would it benefit me, and he said probably not.  I asked about medication and he said I was getting what he would have recommended, but that I might double the fentanyl for more adequate pain relief.  He said I should call back in a couple of weeks if I didn't hear from them about the blood tests.  He said I might have small fiber neuropathy also but the majority of The Leg issues are from the large fiber neuropathy.  Huge sigh.

I got out at about noon, which is fantastic with everything that I did, and started home.  I got home about 6 PM and ended up going to a hospital and leaving there at about midnight because of The Problem.  By the time I got home I was so exhausted I was falling asleep standing up.  I slept very late Friday, and a lot of the day today.  Right now I am so tired I am falling asleep writing this - you probably can tell!!!  Triple huge sigh.

I go back to see Dr. House in six months.  I see Dr. Kildare in a couple of months.  I know that I have large fiber neuropathy, which is more consistent with radiation induced plexopathy but can also be from a lot of different things as it is the most common kind of neuropathy.  I also know that I do not feel cold the same in both of my feet.  One does not feel cold the same as the other.  Hoping the warm foot can teach the rest of my body how to feel warm instead of cold!!  I know there is not a lot that can be done other than what I am already doing for the pain.  Maybe a reason for the problem will come up when the blood test results are in.

The Headache behaved pretty well for all the activity.  The Legs and the pelvic pain and KS#2, not so well.  My mind is the same jumble it was before The Problem hit, and all the travel, and all the walking.  Hoping getting more rest tomorrow will help.  If this post is a little goofy, that is because I am majorly goofy tonight.  Gonna try to get some sleep.  Biggest Sigh Ever!!!

My Emesis Center Is On Overload

Seasick to the Max

Not a good day today for me.  I seemed to not be able to wake up today and slept until about 5:00 in the afternoon.  I think my body needed that, but now I have the erps.  Living in upchuck city this evening. 

Moving my head makes the nausea worse.  Moving my eyes makes the nausea worse.  Closing my eyes makes the nausea worse.  Swallowing anything makes the nausea worse.  Uck.

Not sure if the kidney stone is causing this problem, the UTI or UTI antibiotics is causing this problem, too much dietary fat causing this problem, or medication (especially pain killers) causing this problem.  I am out of phenergan pills.  I have suppositories I could use and I guess I could use one of my IM vials, but I hate to sacrifice one of those before my trip next week.  I am having a bit of right flank pain, so thinking kidney stone #2 is on the march...sigh.

Thinking if this is still going on in the AM I will go to my PCP and get an IM injection there of phenergan.  I am already slightly dehydrated and it won't take long this evening to make me really dehydrated.  I am extremely dizzy and terribly fatigued STILL after all the sleep I had today.

I feel like a bobble head tonight - going to go soak my big old bobble head and see if I feel any better.  Bleh.

My PCP and Injectable Phenergan

A New Puppy and A New Plan

Saw my PCP Thursday morning.  I had only slept about 30 minutes that night and was very nauseous.  I hadn't eaten a meal in at least four days, mostly intake of fluids had kept me going.  I had probably only had a few hours sleep for most of the week.  He agreed that I had probably passed a kidney stone, and that I was now somewhat dehydrated.  My digestive issues, now exacerbated by the neurontin, are part of the problem with managing dehydration.  The more fluids I drink, the more fluid is put out by my bowels - bypassing the kidneys - and the faster I dehydrate.  IV fluids will actually stay in my tissue longer than drinking fluids, even the ones like Gatorade that contain salts and electrolytes.

He ordered 25 mg of IM (intramuscular) phenergan to help manage the nausea because I was at the point I couldn't keep anything down, and I have issues with suppositories becuase of the radiation damage. Sigh.  I also expressed my concern at my next trip to Michigan in a couple of weeks.  Bless his heart, he put a standing order for IM phenergan at his office so all I have to do is call and go get a shot.  He also got me two vials of phenergan and the filter needles, needles and syringes to use before my flights.  His nurse, who is a sweetheart, told me the proper way to break off the top of the glass vials, and where to inject.  Now as long as it doesn't delay me too much with the TSA agents...sigh again!

I also finally have decided to face reality and asked for the paperwork for handicapped license plates.  The airport I will have to go to has a parking lot that is ALL uphill, and I just couldn't bear dragging luggage across it again.  My PCP marked my application as "permanently disabled".  Not sure why, but I was expecting him just to do it for a temporary basis, as in "180 days". 

I have a new member of my family, a little chihuahua mix puppy named Emmett or Emmitt - have trouble reading the handwriting on his paperwork, so not sure of the spelling - I'm sure he doesn't care! 

Recently in my area an animal shelter burned.  This shelter accepted about 50% of the animals from the local humane society.  The animals at the humane society had to be reapportioned through all the other shelters, plus a new state law had dog breeders dumping excess puppies and older breeding stock to shelters so everyone was a bit overcrowded.  I decided to look for a small dog that would fit in with my dachshund.  A lady I know from a discussion group and facebook has rescued several chihuahuas that were sooo cute! There seemed to be a lot of chihuahuas at the local shelters so I found one that fits with my family and with me.  He is supposed to be yorkie and chihuahua mixed but he looks all chihuahua to me!

I know from experience that I will focus less on myself and my misfortunes if I have a "project" to focus on instead.  Although Emmett is only two months old and weighs a tiny bit over a pound, getting him potty trained and obedience trained will be something I can work on outside of my problems.  He is very calm and well socialized and seems to be very sweet natured and my mother loves him.  Augie my dachshund has already offered him one of his treats which is a great sacrifice for Augie!

The neurontin side effects seem to have stabilized by now (day 10) to be mainly digestive with some dizziness.  I don't think now they are going to morph into any different side effects as Dr. Kildare and my PCP both say I won't be able to tolerate a higher dose.  Rats!  The pain relief  is far from complete and my PCP wants me to start taking Dilaudid with the neurontin at night.  I haven't yet, but may tomorrow night if the pain does not get better tonight.

I called Dr. House's office (the neuromuscular specialist) to make sure Dr. Kildare's staff had sent the medical records to them, and to verify that they accepted my insurance.  Pluses on both counts, but the negative is they have not made an appointment for me, and they are currently booking appointments in the March to April range.  Big Sigh...

Emmett is squeaking, his way of protesting - not much of a barker, mostly a squeaky boy.  A little bit whiney - just like me!  I guess I'll go tend to his puppy needs (which mostly seem to be hold me, cuddle me, pet me) and rock him to sleep.  Kidney stone #2 is on the move - I may try some parsley tea a reader suggested to see if I can get it to move along!!!

Kidney Rocks

Passing Stones = Wishing You Passed Out

I know today what I did not know yesterday:  My terrible stomach (and I thought pancreas) spasms were due to a kidney stone making its escape from my left kidney.  This explains why two syringe fulls of fentanyl  at the ER yesterday morning didn't seem to do anything much for my pain..plus why my blood pressure was at 162/110!

I last passed kidney stones about a year and a half ago - there were three of them.  I know from the CT scan I had yesterday that I have a kidney stone in my right kidney.  Since I got rid of all my stones in 2009 this must be a new stone.  I suspicion that my left kidney HAD a stone, probably a small or sandy stone, that was not detectable by CT scan.

Besides the "colicky" pain, the clue I had today was (its icky) lots of blood in my urine.  I was prescribed an antibiotic yesterday by the ER doc.  I was offered prescriptions for heavy duty pain killers, but I already have plenty of those on hand.  I was angry at my body so just went to work after getting out of the ER and toughed out the pain.  This was not easy to do, as the pain was god awfully godawful.  Today I am still in pain but it goes in spells.  I fear that the stone in my right kidney will decide to take a sled ride down to my bladder too. 

The Headache is not happy tonight.  The pain is very bad.  I think my pain cup is way overfull.  I am hiving everywhere and itchy.  I am not sure if the hives are from the kidney stone pain (yes I sometimes hive if I am in tons of pain!) or the neurontin or the antibiotic. Itchy Itchy Itchy!  I have taken benedryl so maybe it will get better soon.

Neurontin Day 6 & 7

Yesterday was Day 6 of taking neurontin and today is Day 7.  I am dizzy and have a hard time setting still since taking tonight's dose.  The diarrhea (a second icky thing) is much worse.  I still have fairly significant leg and pelvic pain, but it has faded in comparison to the kidney stone pain!!!  Guess that's a plus for the kidney stone.

This maybe TMI for most of you but I have a compromised anal sphincter from fibrotic changes from radiation.  I already have chronic diarrhea and quick motility for the same reason.  So neurontin seems to have increased both the number of stools and how quickly I have to hit the bathroom.  Yesterday I had two "accidents" and I am up to four tonight.  I simply cannot hold back the stool before I can get to the bathroom.  And today I have had zero, nada, zilch to eat - just liquids because of the abdominal pain - so right now it seems to be - urge, get up walk three steps, uh oh bad news, try to get to the bathroom to clean up.  I have adult diapers or as one of my friends insists - disposable briefs - and may need to break these out if this keeps up. Incontinence pads are just not sufficient.  I generally regulate this by going to the bathroom on a schedule but neurontin just doesn't care!!!  :(

I see Dr. Kildare tomorrow, so I guess I will see what he has to say.  [Keep an open mind Winny!]  It's going to be another long night!  One of these nights I will have a regular night's sleep.

Larry Moe And Curly

Another Doctor Dunce Day

My three kidney stones have officially "left the building" Spent about six hours yesterday in the emergency room, trying to stop vomiting. Finally got that stopped, and XRays show no more kidney stones. I had named my stones Larry Moe and Curly since they were doing a number on my plumbing. The ER doc thought having all three passing was why I was having such a problem with nausea and that the episode seemed to go on and on and on.

Phenergan had not worked to stop the nausea, so we tried Zofran (which a nurse friend of mine had recommended some months ago). It took a lot of Zofran to get The Belly to settle down, but it did the job on the second try. I go to see my regular physician for a followup tomorrow afternoon. I feel tons better today, so Yeah!!

The Headache is still hanging around but just in the background. I can pretend some days it isn't even there! I'm getting so used to the stimulator that I forget it is installed. The worst part is remembering not to jerk my neck suddenly. I'm feeling ready to be back at work full time, and will try hitting it as hard as I can this week because I have several projects to get caught up on. I was not planning on the kidney stone hiatus.

I saw my radiation oncologist [Dr. Dunce #3] for my yearly appointment. We discussed my problems from the radiation therapy from 2004..at least I discussed and he tried to tell me it was not possible. I patiently listened while he tried to blame #1 my diabetes (which started just before I was diagnosed with cancer and has been in excellent control since) #2 my hysterectomy operation #3 the arthritis in my lower spine which coincidentally is only in the pelvic radiation field. He said if I had damage from radiation I would have bled just buckets and buckets of blood. I find that hard to believe, as there are tons of peer reviewed articles that mention fibrosis as a radiation side effect, and bleeding copiously is not mentioned as a prerequisite. I have had thousands of dollars worth of tests trying to find any other cause for my problems, and so far have not been able to come up with anything.

He had not bothered to review my medical records from the last year before I saw him. I find that aggravating. I know he has many patients in active treatment, but take five minutes to glance over the information before coming into the exam room.

This was supposed by be my last appointment with him - I was to be released, but even though he swears I could not have experienced radiation damage he wants to follow me for another year. He said my MRI had evidence of a pinched nerve at S1 on my spine, and I made him read the radiologist's report for me (as I had already read it because I pull ALL tests results for my own records) from my last pelvic MRI and repeat out loud the part that said no stenosis or nerve impingement found. He acted surprised that I have been having pelvic pain and at the same time altered or lack of sensation although we have discussed it every appointment we have had as it has worsened over the years. I guess he only documents "positive" comments and ignores the rest?

I asked him what my next step should be, who should I consult and his reply was to shrug and say "I don't know." Not "let's find out - I need to research this a little longer" or "maybe you should talk to your PCP concerning this" - just "I don't know". Oooh, I felt like screaming! The Doctor Dunces are all from the "I don't know - you figure it out" school of "Ignore it and it will go away" (it being the annoying patient) Medical College. I think they also aspire to the magical thinking theory of medicine - think good thoughts and everything will magically be all better. I'd get better treatment at the Christian Science Reading Room down the road from the Onocology building. At least they take action through prayer!

He also said he would be interested in what I find out. Find out what, from whom?? If he's so interested then refer me somewhere so they will be sure to share the information with him. Otherwise if I have to do all the legwork, I'm not going to have any desire to educate my Dr. Dunce physician.

By the way, I once read there are just two types of people in the world: those who LOVE the Three Stooges and those who HATE the Three Stooges. Which side of the fence do you sit on?? I'm definitely a Stooge lover. Maybe because there is a little bit of Moe in me?

Spinning Out Kidney Stones

On My Wish List

Wishing for a device that could just spit out my kidney stones, you know: like a giant human gyroscope or one of those paint shakers like they use to mix paints at the hardware store. Still having issues but they are lessening.

A beautiful cool day in August in Missouri. What happened to the global warming problem? We seem to be having the opposite. Downside: I always look forward to August because that means dormant grass - no mowing. The grass is still green and lovely but the mowing continues also.

I am looking forward to a big family reunion for my Mom's family on Labor Day weekend. I will see some relatives I am sure I have never met and meet some relatives I won't recognize, but it will be fun. My Mom came from an extremely large family (14 brothers and sisters) and only she and her younger brother are left from her generation. This is sort of a get together for them. I am glad The Headache is behaving itself because it will be tested I am sure that weekend. I expect there will be approximately 100 people there, and that won't be all of us! Only some of my nieces and nephews can make it, as many live pretty far away.

I am reminded of a post that Migraine Puppet had a month or so ago about a family reunion, and the inability to escape from overstimulation. Hope that mine turns out a little better. There will be nowhere to hide, since the closest I can find a decent hotel room is thirty some miles away. Hopefully I can just turn up my buzzer (occipital stimulator) and drown out The Headache pain if it comes, and most of all hopefully I won't have any pain at all by then! Wouldn't that be great??

Electronically Transformed

Is The Headache Disappearing?

I am starting to have hope, and that can be a dangerous thing. I have tried to keep optimistic wishful thinking out of the process of working through this occipital stimulator trial. I have endeavored to be as honest as possible about what kind of pain I am having or not having. Despite the pain I have been having from the dreaded passing of the kidney stone, The Headache has settled down and seems to be behaving nicely.

The Headache has been having brief flares of intense pain that quickly subside, instead of hours and hour and hours of intense pain that stayed despite all efforts to reduce it. The rest of the time The Headache has been down in the two to four out of ten range. My medication usage is down also, some days I don't have to take anything at all, and have been able to make do with phenergan and vistaril. I think I may be reaching the end of the bell curve of pain I've been experiencing for the last two years. Finally.

I believe it is the stimulator that is making the difference. I reviewed my pain diaries for the last two years, and my average pain level was between a seven and an eight on the pain scale, with a few months at the completely non-functional nine. I still am experiencing some pain, but nothing at that level and that duration. I keep the stimulator on constantly at a simmer, occassionally bringing it up to a boil. If this is a placebo effect, it sure is a powerful one!

I am able to do some physical activity and not pay for it with hours of increased pain. My blood pressure is staying down (except for the brief and steep rise because of the kidney stone) to my normal 110/70 level. My fasting blood sugar is down to 85, where it was running from 114 to 140. I've lost 10 pounds in the last month because I can move again without my head exploding. Of course being so nauseous from The Belly you can't eat anything helps with the weight loss, but it's not my preferred method. I really need to join a gym where I can swim even in the winter (my preferred form of exercise), but that is going to have to wait until I can return to work full time for awhile. That is where my energy will go to in the next month.

The kidney stones are still in the process of passing. This seems a very long drawn out procedure, but part of this is because I can't keep liquids down consistently. No sleep so far tonight, as I think The Stone is on the move again. It sure has thrown a damper on my work week, and my progress in getting the sun room cleaning project finished. The Belly doesn't like The Stone either. Wish I had an electrical stimulator for The Stone and The Belly!

Kidney Stones

What a Day!

Haven't been feeling too great, but thought that it was the aftermath of the flu from last week. I have been having a lot less headache pain, so I guessed I'm just feeling other pain in my body because that The Headache isn't overpowering everything. I have been working more hours this week, almost back to eight hours again - should have known I wouldn't have a 40 hour work week. I feel all whiney tonight but I think it is the pain medication.

I started having extremely painful internal spasms at work, so bad I couldn't hardly talk or walk. I tried to wait it out, saying to myself "Stupid - you worked too much on a ladder last weekend - now you are paying the price!" I wasn't thinking too well - as happens when I'm in a lot of pain - and after a coworker asked what was wrong with me, finally figured out I should go see a doctor. I drove myself to urgent care, and they did a urinalysis finding that I was passing almost more blood than urine, which is a symptom of kidney stones.

The Headache decided to get into what I call a "pain feedback loop" and started acting up too. I fiddled with the stimulator, and it seemed to drop the pain back a notch or two on The Headache.

My blood pressure was sky high, and they did a CT scan of my pelvic region and confirmed that I had kidney stones. My ureter wasn't blocked and the spasms had calmed down by then, so I was given a script for pain medication and told to go home and drink plenty of water. I also was given a strainer to strain my urine for the next two days to try to catch the stone or stones as they work their way out so they can analyze them to see what kind of stone I am making. Ewwwwww. I have a couple of stones that are still in my kidneys, but they aren't the ones causing the pain.

I am extremely nauseated, even taking phenergan is not stopping the vomiting. Their instructions said I was to go to the emergency room if I can't keep anything down. I'm going to give it a few hours and see if this will quit before morning. I have been able to sip some liquids and keep that down this evening but large quantities of water have not been possible. Pacing the floor seemed to help, and I am going to try a hot bath before I go to bed - some web sites stated that could help.

I was hoping all would be back to normal soon, but that wasn't in the cards for me today. Perhaps the remains of the stone will pass tonight and I will be back at work tomorrow. I am still feeling quite a bit of pain, and that's with vicodin and phenergan in me. Comparing kidney stones to pancreatitis, acute pancreatitis was more painful, and the stones seem easier to treat. The Belly doesn't like either condition.

Here's the problem I can see with kidney stones: I live my life on the edge of dehydration. If I increase my fluid intake I also increase the diarrhea that is caused by the damage from the radiation therapy five years ago. I then start passing more water than I take in, and that dehydrates me more quickly. So for me, more liquids equals quicker deydration (believe me, I've had to go to the ER for that a few times before I figured out what was going on). So no matter what I do, I am toast as far as liquid intake is concerned..which will mean more urinary tract infections, and more kidney stone formation.

Ah well, that's what I get for not ordering the extra absorbant digestive system option and the radiation resistant bladder when I was born...and my model year is way too old to upgrade. I'm going to have see if I have some kind of gypsy curse on my head. This illness stuff is getting really old.