Me Without My Stimulator
A total unretouched unedited picture of me today. The Headache rules. No electricity now for 24 hours. My bosses, as always, were so nice when I called in sick today. One even volunteered to drive me where ever I needed to go to pickup the new stimulator controller.
Almost made me cry - well actually it did - but I'm very low at the moment. I know its only temporary, but somehow it is like a flashback to a nightmare which was my two years prior to getting the stimulator installed. It doesn't take much right now to tip me over the edge of tolerance.
Tonight I look like Hell. In addition to the swelling of my left eye due to The Headache, the dilaudid I took is making The Hives more active and my entire face is swelling. The indent around my right eye is where my face is swollen and touching my glasses. Sorta like Mr. Peanut and his monicle! And he carries a cane too - so maybe I'm am slowly metamorphosising [is that even a real word??] into Ms. Peanut! Ewww - now I'm thinking Kafka and the book Metmorphosis! Head - stop it!
The A-Team had no suggestions for pain, other than just keep medicating with dilaudid. I'm leery to take more than one pill a day because I rebound so bad from it, but they said to take it every so many hours. I'm thinking maybe tomorrow I will try and get an IV of solumedrol at the emergency room. Depends on how bad it gets, but I don't think the dilaudid is going to cut it. It reduces the pain a little bit and keeps it from going past my tolerance levels but with the puffiness going on even with antihistimines I am afraid to take a lot of it.
My stimulator controller should be in by Fed Ex Monday, and the A-Team had no problem with me going there to get adjusted. Yeah A-Team! Dr. Hannibal Smith had actually done some research for St. Jude, so it was a happy coincidence for me.
Monday can't come quick enough! It's going to be a bad night tonight, and a very bad weekend too. I'm definitely in Woe is Me land. Note to self: Suck it up, you can handle it! Tomorrow is another day, and there is always Tara.
